INFJ Problems – Rage

Hi, I’m and INFJ and you’ll find it very hard to fight with me.

I dislike conflict immensely and usually have ways of mitigating conflict that don’t involve actual conflict. I talk, I soothe, I manipulate; anything to avoid a big nasty fight.

That does not make me weak though. And it also does not mean I won’t fight when stirred. In fact, the INFJ rage, when awoken, is the stuff of terrifying nightmares.


When I believe I am right or when my principles are challenged I will get ugly. I will use my empathic, intuitive knowledge of you to wound you where it really hurts… often irreparably.

I will speak first, without engaging my brain, and use the deep knowledge I have of you to cut deeply.

Therefore, I beg you, don’t ever tick off your INFJ to the point where they rage. If you do, you are likely to never repair the hurt that results and you may never recover from the wounds you receive.


*If you’d like to know more about INFJs or the Myers Briggs Personality Types follow this link.


23 thoughts on “INFJ Problems – Rage

  1. As another INFJ, I completely agree with that assessment. I think it’s why we work so hard to suppress anger, and find another peaceful solution. We know that if we give in to those roiling emotions, it’s going to be a thoroughly nasty storm.

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      1. Agreed. Among other things I find the mark of a good friend is they see you at your worst and still come back. It can be frightening sometimes.

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  2. I think there’s also a way in which INFJs tend to subtly go out of their way for people, and while it’s easy to recognize that not everyone is going to reciprocate, to anger someone after they’ve gone out of their way for you is just beyond the pale.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. At a certain point I feel like all we can do is our best, whatever that is. Often it’s not quite as good as we’d like, but, even as we like to extol the strength to push through barriers, there is also the reality that everyone has limits, and can’t always be all we wish we were, in a given moment.


  3. As an INFJ & a teacher my classes know this, apparently I’m really lovely, but don’t push me too far, & I will snap. I once shouted at a class & no one said anything for a good half hour, they simply copied from the board in silence.

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      1. A little, but they never settled down even though they were an exam class. I wasn’t sorry when they left , I’m not use to having classes like them. I did feel sorry for they quiet ones.

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  4. Thanks for sharing. I don’t tend to repress anger but I find being creative with it helps. It is quite a force if channelled positively. The poem today on my poetry blog here on WordPress is about female anger in case you have time to look? Have a good day, Sam 🙂

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  5. Like everyone I imagine, there are several layers to my anger. Usually the first layer, or the first 2 layers are directed inwardly. Always questioning myself as to WHY would you allow yourself to be hurt/used/lied to…etc. AGAIN. Then the anger is aimed at the direction of the target causing pain, or whatever it is that they’ve repeatedly done. I work SO very, very hard to just keep my mouth shut for weeks and months on end. I can honestly say that at times, it feels like physical pain when I make myself refrain from retaliation. Ahhhhh…..then comes the storm. The target/person typically will verbally back me into a corner and blast away until I will no longer be a punching bag. I HATE what happens at that point. Physical shaking, hands made into fists, and the verbal barrage begins. What scares me the most is that although I don’t always remember every word I’ve said, I DO remember enjoying firing away at the victim. I scare myself sometimes. Gotta work on it.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It really depends on where I am at the time. If in public then no, I can choke back the crying. If I’m in a safe place then definitely yes! It goes from no tears at all to sobbing anger…then the ugly pours out with no thought of consequences until afterward.

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