INFJ Problems – Observation

Hi. I’m an INFJ… and I don’t miss a trick.

INFJs are often thought of as being clairvoyant or psychic. We are often told we’re intuitive and empathetic. All of this may be true to some degree, but one simple reason why we always seem to know what’s going on is that we’re observant. Keenly so. Insanely so.


While most people go about their lives focussed on what’s happening to them and what they’re doing, INFJs tend to notice what’s happening everywhere and what’s happening to everyone. 

This can be a good thing. This helps us to intuit when something is wrong, when someone is upset, when disaster is about to befall. We can then turn on that empathetic part of our lizard brain and be there as a backstop or the helping hand or sympathetic ear. This is partly why people are so drawn to INFJs.



Our keen powers of observation can also be a very bad thing. First, don’t try to keep secrets from us. It doesn’t work. We see through it.

Second, and more annoyingly, we observe every irritating, ignorant, hateful act committed out there in the world and it cuts us to the core. While driving, for example, we don’t just see the idiot who cut us off… we see the guy who cuts off the car in front. We see the woman on her mobile phone who swerves from her lane into the lane beside her and nearly take out another car. And because we’re all gooey feelings inside, each of these acts of ignorance and selfishness cuts us like it happened to us. 

Same goes for fighting families; bring an INFJ to your family thanksgiving dinner and we’ll observe the passive aggression between you and your sister. We’ll see the underhanded way your mum puts down your life choices. And we’ll feel angry and hurt right along with you.

There are times when I wonder if the INFJ would have an easier time just being blind. What about you fellow INFJs? Do you observe too much?


If you’d like to know more about INFJs or the Myers-Briggs Types Indictor follow this link

21 thoughts on “INFJ Problems – Observation

  1. This is half the reason I like earplugs and headphones. There are times where I do not want to see or hear. We can choose not to see, but we cannot close our ears.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Thanks so much for the link to the personality test. I’d never done one before, and boy – it sure was accurate! Best of all, the first occupation listed for my personality type (campaigner) was that of a writer! It made my day. Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m not sure observe is the right word for me, but I do know that empathy can be my undoing. Sometimes I just have to turn it off, because the weight of carrying all that empathy (for others) can be crushing.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am an INFJ, and have known that for quite some time. Thanks for the link- I took the survey and low and behold- still an INFJ, with Advocate thrown in there! No wonder I was unhappy in the corporate environment. I can lead just fine, but I have to lead in my own way. It has to all have meaning, just as my friendships do. Nice Post Jessica!

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Great post. Yes indeed, observing all is a mixed blessing. I’m sure that it is this trait, that suggests to others that INFJ is clairvoyant. In truth, we just notice the developing pattern early. This can be useful in preempting/avoiding a hostile encounter, or intervening to prevent someone else suffering. I like to think that the Henry Fonda character in ’12 Angry Men’, was probably an INFJ. The downside, is it usually means we are equally ‘self aware’ which can impede relaxation, and tend not just to observe, but to absorb the world around us. Hence, the well documented need for the INFJ ‘door slam’ recharge.


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